This has been sitting in the Drafts section for months. Every time I attempt to finish what I’ve started, the tab remains opened, the title box filled but the text box empty, staring back at me.
But now I think I am ready to finish what I’ve started.
I finally had my actual wake up call, one that was delayed and snoozed for a year.
I know how hard I tried, and try as I may, there are just some things that are never going to be fixed.
I have come to terms with all that has happened.
I accepted the fact that we need distance and time for things to settle in.
That I should stop worrying about the what-if’s and the could-have-been’s.
That it’s okay to have a relapse once in a while.
That all the ebbing pain is slowly coming to a halt.
That I should focus on all the good things I am blessed with.
I decided to set fire to the bridge, after months of contemplation.
I do not want the flowers to be trampled all over again.
I do not want the Lego blocks to be destroyed anymore.
I finally said, “I think I’ve had enough. I am done.”
–
To the people that I love;
whether we have weekly catch-ups or years of silence,
whether in the present or the past,
whether too soon or too late,
there is always a place for you in my heart,
always.